[when did i leave the zoo?]

hahah just a random blog... nobody to talk to online... despite it being a friday night?

okay let's talk about things... how's life? life's good i guess. i guess its still the same lah, finding new pleasures to replace the ones i know i can't have anymore. cursing whatever i used to have, condemning it, though deep inside i know its the best i've ever had. i guess its just the way it has to be...

hahaha somehow all i could dream of is driving some manual transmission car. and loathe all those driving automatic transmissions... haha i dunno why i've become like this... dunno lah its just the beauty of feeling the transmission connect in bits... feel that control over power. someday... porsche... grrrr. must make it work out.

hahaha sometimes we are motivated alot not by what we want to be, but cos we know wad we don't want to be. i feel that's the case for me. but to be, or not to be, what's the difference. in the end you know what you want and that's all that matters.

i used to think of how small minded people can be, living out their own lives, striving for merely simple things. nobody worries about the world running out of space and oil running out. everyone's just worrying about how their gonna fill their tank tml. how they are going to avoid the morning hour traffic. with a family yah its them first everyone else second. simple logic.

gonna try to rise above all that. dunno how right now, but i must.

somehow i have this feeling i'll just turn out like everyone else lah. dreams of youth drowned in tears. dreams obscured by the scars that dictate the course of our lives.

man is a rope across an abyss.