[....]

"gimme hope jo'anna." the lyrics keep replaying in my head, though the song is about some sociopolitical issues in Africa. something like Walking on the Sun by Smashmouth. Hiding some serious stuff in soothing songs. devious.

"hope before the morning comes"

i guess my favourite scene in S3 was when the final battle stage was set. the reporter's voice in the background as spidey swings into the swing.

the words we've heard so many times before yet had a special significence for me today.

"just as all hope seems lost"

kinda makes u feel that no matter what great shithole you're in. u can find a way out. or maybe just stay afloat long enough for others to save your sorry ass.

resolved to grow out my hair and look more "professional" than my current "sporty" look.

finally dared to ask for reasons today. reasons that seems so .... were they even said then?

well, till the next person saves me from the shambles i've been reduced to yet again.

i guess my attempts become whole again were recently interrupted. shall pursue that course yet again. only way i can ever see myself truly free from the vicissitudes of fate. at least, from other people.